So, Friday we had our appointment with RE#3 (RE#1 since we moved). Let's call her, hmmmm, how about Dr. Duh. That's what I kind of felt like while we were talking over our history. Once she got down to the nitty gritty she seemed to know what she was talking about, but she just seemed a little air headed or something. We didn't hate her, but didn't love her either.
We honestly walked out both wishing that we had finished what we started back before we moved. We agreed we would have probably used Dr. Erb. Either way, she wants me to get all my cycle testing updated, get an updated sperm analysis and some genetic testing on K. It seemed like these two tests that she wants for him, if they turn out that he has them, she might not want to do IVF w/ICSI with his boys. She gave the impression that she didn't want to play God.
Um. Yeah. Anyone else see any irony here? That's what I thought.
But OK, maybe there are long term repercussions, which we didn't quick think to ask at the moment. So we'll probably get them done.
However. There was another RE here that I had tried to call originally but couldn't get through. So I tried again on Monday, and got through. Set up an initial consult for February 16.
We actually went out to dinner after the appointment on Friday and seriously discussed just stopping the insanity. Just being OK with one kid. This all came up after being slightly disappointed with the RE, with weaning not going well (it's slowly getting better), and just the stress in general. Plus, Bug has been a pill for the last week and a half or so. We really had to talk that one through, discuss the pros and con's to having her be an only child.
But we couldn't agree to that. We want to give it this try. One more time. So I set up this second consult, and we'll see how that goes. Then we'll go from there and make the decision on who we will move forward with. We did agree that if it doesn't work, then we'll stick to our original plan of doing just one IVF, FET if there are any on ice after the IVF, maybe a couple of cycles of donor sperm IUI, and then onto adoption. Still an option if nothing seems to be panning out is to go the one child route.
So much insanity.
Showing posts with label donor sperm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label donor sperm. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Monday, November 21, 2011
ICLW
Hello Fellow ICLW'ers!
This is the second time that I've done ICLW, but it's been a while. So I'll give you a quick run down on me and who I am. K (the husband) and I started trying to get pregnant in early 2006. Around a year into it (and after K telling me for months that we needed to get checked) we got checked. Due to Cryptochordism as a child that went untreated until K was old enough to remember having the surgery, we were dealt the blow of moderately severe MFI. We met with an Andrologist for a bit (a urologist specializing in male infertility) and tried Clomid for both of us along with some vitamins etc, only to find out that even if they helped K's numbers, they would still be so bad that IUI/AI still wouldn't do the trick. There were around 600,000 swimmers in his samples, with less than 20% morphology and less than 15% motility (or maybe I have those %'s backwards). So we self referred to an RE and jumped head first into IVF.
IVF cycle 1 round 1 was cancelled due to severe hyper stimulation. IVF cycle 1 round 2 was cancelled because I ovulated before we started antegon. IVF cycle 1 round 3 was a BFN.
We finally conceived via a donor, and have our beautiful daughter Bug, who is just about 16 months old.
Since she was born we have not prevented. It took me a while to get AF back due to nursing, but she did finally join us. We are now back on the wagon and dealing with secondary IF. We met with a couple of RE's in September (we moved since treatments), and had been in the process of deciding IVF vs Donor sperm IUI and which doctor to go to, when my job transferred me 5 1/2 hours away and K got laid off. So now, we continue to not prevent and have set aside extra money in next years flex save account. We move next week, and will immediately work on setting up a couple of meet and greet appointments with a couple of new RE's and make our decision on which we'll use. While we had originally been leaning toward donor sperm IUI, we have now officially decided to give IVF one LAST chance, then we will move onto donor sperm IUI and then adoption after a couple of cycles.
Here's to admitting that secondary IF is no easier than primary IF. The road is still hellish and long. But having BTDT is currently giving me a different attitude towards everything, and the continued months of negative aren't killing me, I'm not tracking ovulation (although I typically can tell) and I'm only kind of paying attention to when AF comes. I'm sure this may change once treatments get going again, but I'll keep my sanity as long as possible.
I look forward to finding some new bloggers to follow, and maybe gaining some new followers myself!
Happy ICLW!
This is the second time that I've done ICLW, but it's been a while. So I'll give you a quick run down on me and who I am. K (the husband) and I started trying to get pregnant in early 2006. Around a year into it (and after K telling me for months that we needed to get checked) we got checked. Due to Cryptochordism as a child that went untreated until K was old enough to remember having the surgery, we were dealt the blow of moderately severe MFI. We met with an Andrologist for a bit (a urologist specializing in male infertility) and tried Clomid for both of us along with some vitamins etc, only to find out that even if they helped K's numbers, they would still be so bad that IUI/AI still wouldn't do the trick. There were around 600,000 swimmers in his samples, with less than 20% morphology and less than 15% motility (or maybe I have those %'s backwards). So we self referred to an RE and jumped head first into IVF.
IVF cycle 1 round 1 was cancelled due to severe hyper stimulation. IVF cycle 1 round 2 was cancelled because I ovulated before we started antegon. IVF cycle 1 round 3 was a BFN.
We finally conceived via a donor, and have our beautiful daughter Bug, who is just about 16 months old.
Since she was born we have not prevented. It took me a while to get AF back due to nursing, but she did finally join us. We are now back on the wagon and dealing with secondary IF. We met with a couple of RE's in September (we moved since treatments), and had been in the process of deciding IVF vs Donor sperm IUI and which doctor to go to, when my job transferred me 5 1/2 hours away and K got laid off. So now, we continue to not prevent and have set aside extra money in next years flex save account. We move next week, and will immediately work on setting up a couple of meet and greet appointments with a couple of new RE's and make our decision on which we'll use. While we had originally been leaning toward donor sperm IUI, we have now officially decided to give IVF one LAST chance, then we will move onto donor sperm IUI and then adoption after a couple of cycles.
Here's to admitting that secondary IF is no easier than primary IF. The road is still hellish and long. But having BTDT is currently giving me a different attitude towards everything, and the continued months of negative aren't killing me, I'm not tracking ovulation (although I typically can tell) and I'm only kind of paying attention to when AF comes. I'm sure this may change once treatments get going again, but I'll keep my sanity as long as possible.
I look forward to finding some new bloggers to follow, and maybe gaining some new followers myself!
Happy ICLW!
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Where have I been?
It seems like it's been forever since I've written. So, where have I been?
Last weekend I had to drive out to Cleveland for my first day of work in my new job. It's a 5 1/2 hour drive, with Bug that ends up being more for breaks and a full sit down meal versus a quick drive through.
Bug's sleeping hasn't been any better. Well, it was for about 3 days, then it got worse again. I have no idea what's going on, although I have a feeling quite a bit of it is due to K being gone (and has been now for over a month). We'll see how it changes once he gets home in about 2 weeks. (which I'm SO over him being gone!!!).
So, I had my open enrollment for work last week. K and I chatted about it, choosing the right health plan, and deciding how much money to put in our flexsave account. Well, we decided on $3,000. We picked this because, even though we were leaning heavily towards doing donor sperm IUI, we have instead decided to go all out and do IVF. With the money from flexsave, plus our return, my bonus and maybe some credit card debt, we think we can make it work. Yes, even with him off. He is fighting the state trying to get his unemployment, which would help GREATLY, but he's being careful to tell them he's out of state because of some stuff he found online. They are trying to tell us that he hasn't paid to the state, but we have his check stubs to prove it, but he has to go into the office to get it hashed out. So I don't know how that's going to work right before we move, but we'll end up filing in Ohio anyways, but I'm concerned about how it'll all pan out.
So big decisions. We'll plan on picking a new RE soon after moving, and probably get things going after the first of the year. That gives me time to get Buggie weaned and get any updated tests that the RE wants to see.
It's been strange working out of this office but not having any reps there report to me like they used to. I'm trying to get some backlogged stuff caught up now before the big move happens. Wish me luck!
On the move front, the movers pack us all up and in the first of the week of Thanksgiving. We get in the car and drive out the day before Thanksgiving, so it'll be nice to spend Thanksgiving with my parents. Then we get the keys and they unload the day after Thanksgiving!
Wow, it's all coming so fast!!
And the GMAT? In case you're wondering... I'm squeezing some studying in here and there, and I take it on Wednesday. It'll be nice to have that off my chest.
Have a great one!!
Last weekend I had to drive out to Cleveland for my first day of work in my new job. It's a 5 1/2 hour drive, with Bug that ends up being more for breaks and a full sit down meal versus a quick drive through.
Bug's sleeping hasn't been any better. Well, it was for about 3 days, then it got worse again. I have no idea what's going on, although I have a feeling quite a bit of it is due to K being gone (and has been now for over a month). We'll see how it changes once he gets home in about 2 weeks. (which I'm SO over him being gone!!!).
So, I had my open enrollment for work last week. K and I chatted about it, choosing the right health plan, and deciding how much money to put in our flexsave account. Well, we decided on $3,000. We picked this because, even though we were leaning heavily towards doing donor sperm IUI, we have instead decided to go all out and do IVF. With the money from flexsave, plus our return, my bonus and maybe some credit card debt, we think we can make it work. Yes, even with him off. He is fighting the state trying to get his unemployment, which would help GREATLY, but he's being careful to tell them he's out of state because of some stuff he found online. They are trying to tell us that he hasn't paid to the state, but we have his check stubs to prove it, but he has to go into the office to get it hashed out. So I don't know how that's going to work right before we move, but we'll end up filing in Ohio anyways, but I'm concerned about how it'll all pan out.
So big decisions. We'll plan on picking a new RE soon after moving, and probably get things going after the first of the year. That gives me time to get Buggie weaned and get any updated tests that the RE wants to see.
It's been strange working out of this office but not having any reps there report to me like they used to. I'm trying to get some backlogged stuff caught up now before the big move happens. Wish me luck!
On the move front, the movers pack us all up and in the first of the week of Thanksgiving. We get in the car and drive out the day before Thanksgiving, so it'll be nice to spend Thanksgiving with my parents. Then we get the keys and they unload the day after Thanksgiving!
Wow, it's all coming so fast!!
And the GMAT? In case you're wondering... I'm squeezing some studying in here and there, and I take it on Wednesday. It'll be nice to have that off my chest.
Have a great one!!
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
House Hunt and serious baby fever
So, our house hunt this weekend went really well. We spent a LOT of time in the car, drove about 1000 miles total, totally screwed up Bug's naps, but I think we have found our house! It is just contingent on the owner finding an apartment by November 1, that way if she doesn't we have enough time to try to find a new place. All of the paperwork in regards to my transfer is still going through, so that kinda sucks as I feel a little like I'm in limbo. The house we are living in now is up for rent, we are signing all the paperwork for our new place, but the work stuff is still being finalized. Ugh.
Bug is sick,again still. She's been getting headaches (hitting her head against things), been real tired and grumpy, and has had this absolutely, horrible, knock you over bad breath. It's SO bad! I mean, come on, baby's breath usually smells good! Man, I am telling you, in the middle of the night when it's at its worst I have to turn my head away from her to get some fresh air sometimes! So, we took her to the doctor yesterday, they did ANOTHER strep test, and it came back negative. So, they decided to go ahead and put her on an antibiotic since she's been sick for so long now. On a good note, tooth number 5 popped through the gum last nigh - and it's a top tooth! Woo Hoo! Now I just hope the other top tooth comes through, otherwise I might giggle a little at my cutie pie with 4 bottom teeth and 1 top tooth :-)
K left for his training, boo. We are going to miss him so much. It's going to be hard with him gone as I'm still trying to study for my GMAT, which I rescheduled (at the cost of $50 thank you) for the beginning of November. I needed the extra time to study.
So, I have 4 people in my life that are pregnant right now. One is due this month, one is due November (my friend that lost her son!), one is due December, and one is due February. I'm happy for them, but I'm really feeling the strain of wanting another. Of course K's lay off and this move are slowing the process down. I work hard to remind myself that we will get a chance to try again, it's just a matter of time. The best part about it is that I can cuddle bug and it makes me feel so much better. I just so badly want to give her a sibling. It's been a year of unprotected sex again, but I didn't get my cycle back until about 6 months ago (or so). I know it's not affecting me as bad though, because the sex isn't about baby making. In fact, it's very strange, it's not like that at all. I think it's because I've accepted that we'll never get the 'happy accident' together, and I have come to terms with that. We are still stressing a little about IUI versus IVF, but I really have a feeling we'll go donor sperm IUI, just because we don't want that huge age gap.
Now that I've gone over a hodge podge of items, I have to get back to work. Hope everyone is having a great week!
Bug is sick,
K left for his training, boo. We are going to miss him so much. It's going to be hard with him gone as I'm still trying to study for my GMAT, which I rescheduled (at the cost of $50 thank you) for the beginning of November. I needed the extra time to study.
So, I have 4 people in my life that are pregnant right now. One is due this month, one is due November (my friend that lost her son!), one is due December, and one is due February. I'm happy for them, but I'm really feeling the strain of wanting another. Of course K's lay off and this move are slowing the process down. I work hard to remind myself that we will get a chance to try again, it's just a matter of time. The best part about it is that I can cuddle bug and it makes me feel so much better. I just so badly want to give her a sibling. It's been a year of unprotected sex again, but I didn't get my cycle back until about 6 months ago (or so). I know it's not affecting me as bad though, because the sex isn't about baby making. In fact, it's very strange, it's not like that at all. I think it's because I've accepted that we'll never get the 'happy accident' together, and I have come to terms with that. We are still stressing a little about IUI versus IVF, but I really have a feeling we'll go donor sperm IUI, just because we don't want that huge age gap.
Now that I've gone over a hodge podge of items, I have to get back to work. Hope everyone is having a great week!
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
My Friday
Hi All!
Well, Bug is feeling better, but I think her 2 top teeth may finally be getting ready to come in. She got tooth number 4 just about a week ago... another one on the bottom! Once it comes in a little more I'll try to get a picture of it. Her fever finally went away, but then it turned into this all over body rash that looked HORRIBLE. She is still a little on the irritable side, and not sleeping real great, but we're getting there.
On another note, we are getting ready to go house searching. Someone asked in my post about moving, where we were going. We are going to Cleveland, Ohio. We are excited, but nervous and scared too. Wish us luck!
So we agreed that as soon as we move we are going to find a new RE again, and look at getting the process started. We both agreed that we are about 90% prepared to go donor sperm IUI route, in part because of the timing. We really don't want to wait another 5 years while we get K back to work and save up the money that we are going to be eating away during his lay off. I think he's really excited about it. During dinner tonight he was talking about taking Bug out on the boat next year, and taking her swimming, and then was joking with me about me not being able to go because hopefully I'd be pregnant, and I get so darn large when I'm pregnant that I wouldn't be able to swim for fear of being top heavy. (all in good fun joke :-) Then after we had just finished giving Bug a bath, and I was holding her and he was standing next to us, he made a comment that what would complete the picture would be another little one is his arms. It's SO sweet, I know he's really excited about doing it again.
Well, so much more to say, but off to my last class for my GMAT prep course. Which yes, I will still be doing even though we are moving. I'm a glutton for punishment... new job, new city, TTC with help, MBA, K laid off.... yep, I thrive on stress LOL.
Please know - even if I'm not commenting a lot on blogs, I am reading them! It's just a time issue right now...
Well, Bug is feeling better, but I think her 2 top teeth may finally be getting ready to come in. She got tooth number 4 just about a week ago... another one on the bottom! Once it comes in a little more I'll try to get a picture of it. Her fever finally went away, but then it turned into this all over body rash that looked HORRIBLE. She is still a little on the irritable side, and not sleeping real great, but we're getting there.
On another note, we are getting ready to go house searching. Someone asked in my post about moving, where we were going. We are going to Cleveland, Ohio. We are excited, but nervous and scared too. Wish us luck!
So we agreed that as soon as we move we are going to find a new RE again, and look at getting the process started. We both agreed that we are about 90% prepared to go donor sperm IUI route, in part because of the timing. We really don't want to wait another 5 years while we get K back to work and save up the money that we are going to be eating away during his lay off. I think he's really excited about it. During dinner tonight he was talking about taking Bug out on the boat next year, and taking her swimming, and then was joking with me about me not being able to go because hopefully I'd be pregnant, and I get so darn large when I'm pregnant that I wouldn't be able to swim for fear of being top heavy. (all in good fun joke :-) Then after we had just finished giving Bug a bath, and I was holding her and he was standing next to us, he made a comment that what would complete the picture would be another little one is his arms. It's SO sweet, I know he's really excited about doing it again.
Well, so much more to say, but off to my last class for my GMAT prep course. Which yes, I will still be doing even though we are moving. I'm a glutton for punishment... new job, new city, TTC with help, MBA, K laid off.... yep, I thrive on stress LOL.
Please know - even if I'm not commenting a lot on blogs, I am reading them! It's just a time issue right now...
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Furloughed
So, K took off last Sunday for the last part of his duty this month. He was sitting hotel reserve, with a bunch of other people and not a full crew. Tuesday he got a random call from the travel scheduler that he could go home and do home reserve. OK, we were happy because Wednesday was his birthday, but he thought this scheduler was being spiteful towards another FE that was also sitting reserve with him (she's that kind of person).
Well, then Wednesday night, the October schedule went out to rebid.
Thursday night, all the crew that was in training for upgrades had training cancelled.
Friday morning K got the first call from a buddy that said buddy was furloughed. He called me (I was on the road for work) and let me know. We knew it had been coming, but we got complacent because it hadn't happened. A couple more phone calls and texts later, he got his call. Apparently they saved him for last because the guy that had to make the calls really liked K.
So, he's officially furloughed. He already started the process to go to Dallas and get his CFI and CFII so that he can get a job to build up his hours. It'll be a 30 day program, but the good news is no more 20 days away after that, at least for a while. Until he gets a job flying the big birds again.
I consider us lucky. We still have my income, and some money in savings. We'll be OK, it's going to hurt, and we'll pull out of savings Every. Month. (from what we are hearing his unemployment won't be a whole lot, but that is still to be determined... depends on what state we can claim it in). But we'll make it. We've been here before (he got laid off as an A&P back in 2001, yep, right after 9/11), but that doesn't make it fun. Especially since that money was earmarked for IVF.
I know that not everyone will fair so well. I feel so badly for those families. But we do have some tough decisions to make (although nothing nearly as tough as others are dealing with, please know that I get that).
So now, we decide do we go ahead and do the donor sperm and IUI (as it's cheap enough that we can squeak it out once or twice and just make it until I get my bonus or we get our tax refund), or wait the God knows how long to get him a job and replace the money in savings. That could be 5 years down the road!!
Oh yeah, another kink? I've talked with my company about moving me to their headquarters. Which is 5 1/2 hours away from where we are now. I have friends there (not where I'm from though), and my parents live there. Lots of good reasons to go, but I've got to overcome some negativity that I built in with some important people during my days in the dumps of drinking too much after infertility.
So, all in all I think we're handling it well. It's so tough, knowing how much it's affecting. There's so much on hold in my life right now, waiting to see what his unemployment will be, waiting to see if we'll move for my job, etc.
And Buggie? She's just happy that daddy is home. :-)
Well, then Wednesday night, the October schedule went out to rebid.
Thursday night, all the crew that was in training for upgrades had training cancelled.
Friday morning K got the first call from a buddy that said buddy was furloughed. He called me (I was on the road for work) and let me know. We knew it had been coming, but we got complacent because it hadn't happened. A couple more phone calls and texts later, he got his call. Apparently they saved him for last because the guy that had to make the calls really liked K.
So, he's officially furloughed. He already started the process to go to Dallas and get his CFI and CFII so that he can get a job to build up his hours. It'll be a 30 day program, but the good news is no more 20 days away after that, at least for a while. Until he gets a job flying the big birds again.
I consider us lucky. We still have my income, and some money in savings. We'll be OK, it's going to hurt, and we'll pull out of savings Every. Month. (from what we are hearing his unemployment won't be a whole lot, but that is still to be determined... depends on what state we can claim it in). But we'll make it. We've been here before (he got laid off as an A&P back in 2001, yep, right after 9/11), but that doesn't make it fun. Especially since that money was earmarked for IVF.
I know that not everyone will fair so well. I feel so badly for those families. But we do have some tough decisions to make (although nothing nearly as tough as others are dealing with, please know that I get that).
So now, we decide do we go ahead and do the donor sperm and IUI (as it's cheap enough that we can squeak it out once or twice and just make it until I get my bonus or we get our tax refund), or wait the God knows how long to get him a job and replace the money in savings. That could be 5 years down the road!!
Oh yeah, another kink? I've talked with my company about moving me to their headquarters. Which is 5 1/2 hours away from where we are now. I have friends there (not where I'm from though), and my parents live there. Lots of good reasons to go, but I've got to overcome some negativity that I built in with some important people during my days in the dumps of drinking too much after infertility.
So, all in all I think we're handling it well. It's so tough, knowing how much it's affecting. There's so much on hold in my life right now, waiting to see what his unemployment will be, waiting to see if we'll move for my job, etc.
And Buggie? She's just happy that daddy is home. :-)
Monday, September 12, 2011
Decisions, decisions...
Thank you Becky for calling me out :-)
I've been meaning to get this post done since Friday, but I've been studying my butt off for the GMAT. Luckily I don't take it until 10/13, but that is coming up WAY TO FAST!!
So. Lot's to say. Not even sure how to say it all! I'll just start at the beginning.
Thursday Morning we met with RE#1. We're going to call him Dr. ERB. Yep, Dr Erb. (stands for Dr Evil, Rainbows and Butterflies.) Confused yet? Yeah, me too. So, he reminded us of Dr Evil from Austin Powers. The whole way home K was saying '1 million dollars' in that Dr Evil voice. But I digress. The RB is because he was very much 'IF is all rainbows and butterflies' in his attitude. Well, those of you that have gotten to know me, and those of you that are my IF readers and have therefore lived through it, know how VERY. UNTRUE. THAT. IS. But, we liked him.
I had sent both RE's a 3 page document with all the info that I could find in regards to our history.. it included doses of meds, numbers of follies at my ultrasounds, E levels, etc.
So, good conversation with him was he felt that he could change up the meds protocol (thank you) and move forward. He advised with this newer protocol they use for people who fly (I am an over responder) they can do a Lupron Trigger (sounds strange, right? Lupron is usually used to Suppress!), and it has to do with using your natural LH instead of the typical trigger. He says that even women with E levels in the 9000 range (used to land you in the hospital very very sick) could trigger this way and not get OHSS (ovarian hyper stimulation syndrome - the thing that lands you in the hospital). He said he doesn't have to cancel cycle's all that often - woo hoo! Sorry for spelling some of this out, but I know that some readers may not be versed in infertility lingo. He had a great bedside manner, a great sense of humor, and his IVF cycle (not including the meds, office visits, labwork and ultrasounds which can be billed to my insurance) is just under $9,000. We liked that he wants to not do the same basic protocol, we liked his personality and office staff, and we liked (well, as much as you can) his price. They do all of their labs in house. We honestly walked out of there ready to go there. With orders for an updated day 3 labs, an HSG, and a new semen analysis, and the knowledge of what exactly to request, in terms of records, from my old RE's office. (Oh yeah, and he has a satellite office about 2 hours from my old RE, and has seen quite a few patients from there with a lot of the same complaints that K and I have about them!!)
Friday morning, RE#2, or Dr. BK. Dr. Buzzkill. Yep. Dr BK was very much realistic. It doesn't always work, blah blah blah. He wants to go a bit further in terms of testing, do a DNA fragmentation test for K (which has never been done before) to find out if that's part of the reason my embryo's weren't great the first time around. He wants to get all my day 3 labs, and wants to focus on my TSH, as he is wondering if I have a slight form of PCOS. WHAT? Where did that come from? Um, yeah. He's thinking that because I have long cycles, and lots of spotting. But no real other 'typical' symptoms. But long cycles pretty much guarantees that there are some anovulatory cycles in there. So. Other than that the other typical day 3 tests, and an SIS (similar to an HSG) to make sure that there's no polyps or anything up there. He flat out told us he is very aggressive in that if he finds ANYTHING that makes him unhappy during a cycle, he will cancel and aggressively treat it. Which could include surgically removing cysts, etc. Um, I hate cancelled cycles. Like, a lot. And surgery to remove a cyst that may go away on it's own? I'm not so sure about that. BUT. He's doing it to make sure that you have the perfect cycle. Hm, suddenly doesn't sound like it's a bad thing, does it? So, at this appointment we did a baseline ultrasound, which showed him what he expected to see based on where I'm at in my cycle. I like that he did the ultrasound himself (at my old office the nurses always did them). He wants K to come off some blood pressure meds that could be affecting (however slightly) his boys. He wants K to start taking some fertility vitamins, and suggested we go organic when possible to remove toxins. He 'treats the whole body.' 1 Cycle there will run about $2,000 more than the other place. He was very down to business, didn't waste time with small talk. Personality wise we liked the other better, but did like him as well. He did a lot more digging into our histories with his questions than the other one did, so to me seems he is very thorough. BUT, he would want to do a long lupron cycle still, but use menopur and bravelle instead of repronex, but start on a very low dose like I did in the past with the repronex. Um, isn't that the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and expecting different results? I guess it's not exactly the same as he is changing up the meds a little bit. So we walked out of there with orders for day 3 labs (that they do not do in house), a SIS, an ovarian diminished reserve test, and all of these other things. Plus, he wants me to stop BFing, wait 1 cycle then get all the tests, then start BCP's right away and keep on the meds straight until we cycle, meaning skip the 'sugar pills.'
We walk out of that office suddenly very unsure of ourselves. We have NO IDEA where to go from here. With the possibility of K getting furloughed, we knew that we would need to wait until after the first of the year, but with it being a little more expensive than what we paid before, we're afraid we could have to push it off longer. We also have deductible, coinsurance, and copays for all of the insurance covered stuff. So then we started talking about doing donor sperm IUI, as it would be cheaper and we could do it sooner without as much of a hit on our savings.
We keep talking about it, but no decision is made yet. I have no idea where to go. I want that baby that is part of me and part of him, but is it worth the emotional and financial strain? We agreed if we do IVF, it'll be just 1 cycle (and an FET if we have any embies frozen), then we would do a few cycle's of donor sperm IUI (probably just 3), and then move onto adoption. Or, we could try a few donor sperm IUI and then onto IVF and then adoption, or cut out IVF altogether.
Part of the problem is that we never wanted more than 2 kids. So, having 1 already, this decision is it, if we decide not to do IVF and get pregnant off of donor sperm IUI then K will never have a biological child. There's no going back, you know? I don't think that would change either, I don't think we'd decide to have a third just to give him that link. (Becky - I need your experiences here!!!)
We've discussed it. We've thought about it. We've discussed it some more. Then thought about it some more. And we are no closer to a decision. We feel in limbo. If it weren't for his job I think we'd definitely do IVF. So if we would, then why wouldn't we anyways? Timing, and money, and after what it did to us before, is it worth it?
What to do, what to do.
I've been meaning to get this post done since Friday, but I've been studying my butt off for the GMAT. Luckily I don't take it until 10/13, but that is coming up WAY TO FAST!!
So. Lot's to say. Not even sure how to say it all! I'll just start at the beginning.
Thursday Morning we met with RE#1. We're going to call him Dr. ERB. Yep, Dr Erb. (stands for Dr Evil, Rainbows and Butterflies.) Confused yet? Yeah, me too. So, he reminded us of Dr Evil from Austin Powers. The whole way home K was saying '1 million dollars' in that Dr Evil voice. But I digress. The RB is because he was very much 'IF is all rainbows and butterflies' in his attitude. Well, those of you that have gotten to know me, and those of you that are my IF readers and have therefore lived through it, know how VERY. UNTRUE. THAT. IS. But, we liked him.
I had sent both RE's a 3 page document with all the info that I could find in regards to our history.. it included doses of meds, numbers of follies at my ultrasounds, E levels, etc.
So, good conversation with him was he felt that he could change up the meds protocol (thank you) and move forward. He advised with this newer protocol they use for people who fly (I am an over responder) they can do a Lupron Trigger (sounds strange, right? Lupron is usually used to Suppress!), and it has to do with using your natural LH instead of the typical trigger. He says that even women with E levels in the 9000 range (used to land you in the hospital very very sick) could trigger this way and not get OHSS (ovarian hyper stimulation syndrome - the thing that lands you in the hospital). He said he doesn't have to cancel cycle's all that often - woo hoo! Sorry for spelling some of this out, but I know that some readers may not be versed in infertility lingo. He had a great bedside manner, a great sense of humor, and his IVF cycle (not including the meds, office visits, labwork and ultrasounds which can be billed to my insurance) is just under $9,000. We liked that he wants to not do the same basic protocol, we liked his personality and office staff, and we liked (well, as much as you can) his price. They do all of their labs in house. We honestly walked out of there ready to go there. With orders for an updated day 3 labs, an HSG, and a new semen analysis, and the knowledge of what exactly to request, in terms of records, from my old RE's office. (Oh yeah, and he has a satellite office about 2 hours from my old RE, and has seen quite a few patients from there with a lot of the same complaints that K and I have about them!!)
Friday morning, RE#2, or Dr. BK. Dr. Buzzkill. Yep. Dr BK was very much realistic. It doesn't always work, blah blah blah. He wants to go a bit further in terms of testing, do a DNA fragmentation test for K (which has never been done before) to find out if that's part of the reason my embryo's weren't great the first time around. He wants to get all my day 3 labs, and wants to focus on my TSH, as he is wondering if I have a slight form of PCOS. WHAT? Where did that come from? Um, yeah. He's thinking that because I have long cycles, and lots of spotting. But no real other 'typical' symptoms. But long cycles pretty much guarantees that there are some anovulatory cycles in there. So. Other than that the other typical day 3 tests, and an SIS (similar to an HSG) to make sure that there's no polyps or anything up there. He flat out told us he is very aggressive in that if he finds ANYTHING that makes him unhappy during a cycle, he will cancel and aggressively treat it. Which could include surgically removing cysts, etc. Um, I hate cancelled cycles. Like, a lot. And surgery to remove a cyst that may go away on it's own? I'm not so sure about that. BUT. He's doing it to make sure that you have the perfect cycle. Hm, suddenly doesn't sound like it's a bad thing, does it? So, at this appointment we did a baseline ultrasound, which showed him what he expected to see based on where I'm at in my cycle. I like that he did the ultrasound himself (at my old office the nurses always did them). He wants K to come off some blood pressure meds that could be affecting (however slightly) his boys. He wants K to start taking some fertility vitamins, and suggested we go organic when possible to remove toxins. He 'treats the whole body.' 1 Cycle there will run about $2,000 more than the other place. He was very down to business, didn't waste time with small talk. Personality wise we liked the other better, but did like him as well. He did a lot more digging into our histories with his questions than the other one did, so to me seems he is very thorough. BUT, he would want to do a long lupron cycle still, but use menopur and bravelle instead of repronex, but start on a very low dose like I did in the past with the repronex. Um, isn't that the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and expecting different results? I guess it's not exactly the same as he is changing up the meds a little bit. So we walked out of there with orders for day 3 labs (that they do not do in house), a SIS, an ovarian diminished reserve test, and all of these other things. Plus, he wants me to stop BFing, wait 1 cycle then get all the tests, then start BCP's right away and keep on the meds straight until we cycle, meaning skip the 'sugar pills.'
We walk out of that office suddenly very unsure of ourselves. We have NO IDEA where to go from here. With the possibility of K getting furloughed, we knew that we would need to wait until after the first of the year, but with it being a little more expensive than what we paid before, we're afraid we could have to push it off longer. We also have deductible, coinsurance, and copays for all of the insurance covered stuff. So then we started talking about doing donor sperm IUI, as it would be cheaper and we could do it sooner without as much of a hit on our savings.
We keep talking about it, but no decision is made yet. I have no idea where to go. I want that baby that is part of me and part of him, but is it worth the emotional and financial strain? We agreed if we do IVF, it'll be just 1 cycle (and an FET if we have any embies frozen), then we would do a few cycle's of donor sperm IUI (probably just 3), and then move onto adoption. Or, we could try a few donor sperm IUI and then onto IVF and then adoption, or cut out IVF altogether.
Part of the problem is that we never wanted more than 2 kids. So, having 1 already, this decision is it, if we decide not to do IVF and get pregnant off of donor sperm IUI then K will never have a biological child. There's no going back, you know? I don't think that would change either, I don't think we'd decide to have a third just to give him that link. (Becky - I need your experiences here!!!)
We've discussed it. We've thought about it. We've discussed it some more. Then thought about it some more. And we are no closer to a decision. We feel in limbo. If it weren't for his job I think we'd definitely do IVF. So if we would, then why wouldn't we anyways? Timing, and money, and after what it did to us before, is it worth it?
What to do, what to do.
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