Terrible Two's?!

So, Bug's birthday is coming up in just under 3 weeks.  And boy, has she hit the terrible twos!!

I think part of the problem is that she still isn't really talking.  She says (in sign language) More, Eat, Please, Thank you, Milk, Water and Thirsty.  She speaks Mama and Dada (although not very often), This, That, yes, no and Ice.  That's about it.  So I think she's having a hard time communicating, on top of the whole learning to deal with the strong feelings.

Today was a good day.  We only had one mid level and three minor melt downs.  They involved crying and some kicking and hitting of the poor floor.  But there are worse.

Most days, in the time after I get home from work, we manage to have sometimes 3 or more melt downs.  Mind you, this is between about 5:45ish and 7:30ish when she goes to bed.  These melt downs range from minor (not lasting long, mainly just some sitting down and crying), to mid level (crying harder, throwing herself on the floor kicking and screaming) to major (all of the above plus hitting everything in sight including me, the dog, and herself), scratching herself to the point of drawing blood, pulling out her hair, crying so hard she almost pukes, and comes out sweaty and exhausted.

I've tried ignoring, holding through, talking to her softly, talking to her whiny.  I've tried joining her on the floor.  Nothing seems to work.

Is this all normal?  On the weekends it gets BAD.  I mean, sometimes 10, 15 tantrums.  I asked my mom one day if I was like that at her age (or my brother).  She said while we both threw tantrums, they were nothing like Bug's tantrums.

She's obviously a master tantrum thrower.

When K had her in to the dr for her 18 month check up, they gave him some phone numbers to talk to some people about her speech.  They also said we could try to wait it out to 2.  I wanted to call, he wasn't too worried so he misplaced the numbers.  The only new word we seem to have in spoken language since then is ice.  Sometimes I think I hear words (please, eat, more milk, hi, etc etc) but they never last.  I'm honestly getting worried.  And K is hardly ever home, so he doesn't see it as much.  This week was nice, he got almost all of Tuesday, and all day Thursday at home.  Plus, he's home now putting Bug to bed.  Which is so nice.

Speaking of putting bug to bed.  I was really starting to stress because she STILL wasn't going to sleep on her own.  I had no idea how I was going to manage it with her and an infant.  Then we went on vacation and my Mom sleep trained her.  Not in the way I would have chosen, but I was desperate, so it became OK.  She's doing pretty good with letting us put her down and then walk out.  She has cried the last 2 nights though.  I hope it keeps getting better, as I want to try to transition her to a new bed so the new baby can use the crib.  Plus, she won't nap in her crib any longer (she has napped on a cot at daycare for a year now).  So she's been napping on the couch.  I don't love this set up, but it's better than the alternative, which is no nap at all.  She's not ready for that yet.

For the good news, she's still very much a lover when she wants to be.  Nothing makes up for the tantrums more than some big old hugs and kisses from the sweetest little girl I know.